Bwah ha ha!

I believe I was whining on Google+ just a few weeks ago about how Marvel has loads and loads of Canadian superheroes, and DC has barely any. Then, I read the new "Justice League International", and I'm somewhat mollified by the fact that it could be worse. I'm continually wincing at how brutally forced it feels every time someone's nationality is referenced. Here's a direct quote from the first issue:

"As long as Russian sinew and glory are represented, I vote yes. Da!"

You'll notice that he says "yes" twice, but perhaps the writer thinks that "Da" is just something Russians add to the end of all their sentences, like Canadians and "Eh".

Which brings us back to my initial point...

Apparently, they've taken Booster Gold, a character who's been in the DC Universe 25 years (and who's always been a part of my favourite comics), and announced that he's a Canadian.

Whaaaaaat?!?

He doesn't have cold-based powers, he doesn't have a red-and-white costume, he doesn't wield a cosmic hockey stick... he's not half-French, he's not a Mountie, nor is he excessively apologetic.

And, he's got a distinct personality.

It's almost like they took a football-playing, overconfident, attention-starved, likable and laughable guy (who happened to be Canadian) and made him a superhero.

It's all too perfect! I'm not even sure how to describe this feeling... It's like a cool kid in high school just walked up to me and said that he likes playing Dungeons and Dragons, too. I can't believe how wonderful this news is, yet I'm still suspicious that something's going to go horribly wrong with this. I'm already regretting the mean things I thought about him when he was popular, and I'm newly terrified that this might backfire, and he too might become unpopular and blame it on me.

This development may embarrass me yet like "drunken Russian bear as they say in Russia, da." But until that happens, I'm going to be buying a new copy of Justice League International every month, poring over his dialogue looking for little acknowledgements, and hoping against hope the writing (for all characters) improves.

I'm sorry to admit that my fandom can be bought so easily, but this is one of the best moments of my comic-reading life.

(What makes it even better, though, is the fact that Booster Gold is a time traveler from the 35th century. That means that in the DC Universe, Canada will survive the next 1400 years. Honestly, that's better odds than some Canadians are willing to give!)

Election.

Well, here we go -- another federal election. I'm predicting another Conservative minority government, which probably won't surprise many people. What is surprising, though, is that it's happening at all. There's a distinct lack of scandal, outrage, protest and disdain in Canada right now... there are challenges that we have to deal with, but all things considered, we're doing pretty well at the moment. My hope, then, is that this is going to translate into a relatively clean campaign.

With that in mind, I'd like to lay down a few points of etiquette.

Rule #1: Political parties are not evil.

If I may be honest with my socialist soul, the Conservative Party isn't going to plunge the nation into a police state ruled by American corporations. That also goes the other way: I suspect that even if the Green Party were in charge, the oil fields wouldn't get driven to bankruptcy by new regulations - not only because the oil companies would still find a way to make things profitable, but also because any such changes to regulation and enforcement would be tied up for years.

It doesn't matter who your MP is, they'll still send your parents a letter congratulating them on their 50th anniversary, they'll still cut the ribbon at a new hospital wing, they'll still wear your local team's jersey. They're all trying to do their best for Canadians, so enough with the name-calling, already. I admit, there are a few under every tent that'll veer towards corruption, hiring close personal friends as "consultants" and whatnot... but that brings up the second point.

Rule #2: There are more people in the party than just its leader.

Yes, I'm predicting a Conservative minority. But will it be the same minority? Likely not. Every riding has its own feelings about their MPs, and even if Stephen Harper is safe with his seat, that doesn't mean his favourite key players will all be available to serve in the cabinet. Will some provinces change their allegiances? Will certain individuals leave their mark, either by their presence or their absence? For an "unnecessary" election, there's still the potential for a lot of change. And speaking of which...

Rule #3: The election is not unnecessary.

Did it have to be *right* now, in early 2011? No. But complaining about this election being unnecessary is wrong for more than just the previous reason -- there's also the plain and simple fact that this is how our government works. Yes, it'll cost $300 million. If they held it in nine months, you know how much it would cost? $300 million. And if they didn't hold one for another three years, do you think they'd just tell everyone at Elections Canada to take some time off?

Don't get too uptight over the "cost to Canadian taxpayers" for this one. I'm relatively certain they made room for this in the budget. Really, there's only one way it would be a waste of $300 million...

Rule #4: VOTE.

The last federal election had the lowest voter turnout in Canadian history. 41% of the people didn't vote at all. Did the government interpret that as a "none of the above" vote, and change their plans to accommodate this silent majority? Or were those non-voters ignored in return?

Not voting is the easiest way to turn political cynicism into a self-fulfilling prophecy. And like I said before, this is going to be a campaign without scandal or outrage. It's entirely possible that as low as the turnout was last time, this year might be lower still. And that scares me.

Right now, Canadian fighter planes are dropping bombs on Libya, in an effort to help bring democracy to a people who found the courage to leave their houses and be heard.

What right do we have to force democracy on others, when we don't even care about it ourselves?